I hate cell phones. I’ve hated them for a while, but my hatred has been taken to a higher level this week by what seems to be a disturbing new trend. Bald guys wearing those little earpiece thingies. I mean…seriously. Who do they think they are? Captain Picard?
Now, I don’t care if a guy has hair or not. Earpiece thingies are equal opportunity idiot makers. I only mention the bald thing because “Picard wannabes” was the first image I got when I saw them. I’m not a big Star Trek fan. Did Picard even ever wear something so stupid hanging off the side of his head? My gut says no, that he had the sci-fi chest communication thingy, but I could be wrong.
Anyway, equal opportunity idiot makers. The guys without hair look like they’re trying to be Picard. At least it’s pretty obvious that they’re talking on the phone because it’s extremely noticeable on the side of their bald heads. The guys with hair walk around looking like they’re talking to themselves and should be given a wide berth. You can’t really tell they’re on the phone unless you look carefully. And who wants to look carefully at a madman? That just spells T-R-O-U-B-L-E.
This is just the latest in my ever-growing list of reasons to hate cell phones. But I have many others.
First off, is anyone really that important that they need to be in contact with others 24/7? Ok, maybe if you’re a doctor or other people’s lives are depending on you a cell is necessary, but for the vast majority of warm bodies out there it’s just an annoying and rude little toy that mistakenly elevates the sense of self-importance. People think that the world will fall apart if they can’t be reached by phone. Newsflash: It won’t.
Manners have gone by the wayside where cell phones are concerned. I recently went out on a first date with a perfectly nice fella who seemed alright until he answered his cell phone and yakked for a good ten minutes to the guy on the other end about almost nothing while I stood around trying not to eavesdrop. It wasn’t an “escape-route-in-case-this-first-date-sucks” call because he wanted to hang around with me for another couple of hours but also took another 5-10 minute call during that time. These weren’t “I’m-so-busy-and-important-I-can’t-be-away-from-a-phone” calls, either. They were more “I-have-a-cell-phone-and-I’m-afraid-to-miss-any-call, even-the-ones-from-phone-solicitors” calls. It didn’t make a great first impression on me and pretty much tarnished his appeal from the get-go. Dating tip for dummies: Shut it off. (guys and girls!)
You can’t have dinner in a restaurant without some annoying ring tone going off or someone yakking while waiting for friends. Although most people turn off the ringer in movie theatres, they still peek at their phones if they vibrate to see who’s calling and the annoying little screens shine away in the dark. Going to the movies is supposed to be about ESCAPISM. How can you frickin’ well escape if you are a slave to your phone? And speaking of slavery, don’t get me started on text messaging…the decline of proper spelling, people hunched over their little screens and keypads…illiteracy and physical abuse…sure sounds like slavery to me. Liberate yourselves, people!
I recently read Stephen King’s book, “Cell”, in which an insidious signal is broadcast via cell phones and everyone who has one becomes a raging zombie. Only a few phoneless people escape and the future of normal people depends on them. Amen, brother!
I think my hatred of cell phones is rooted in my past. Years of answering phones on the job. At that time, I would hate the sound of a ringing phone when I went home because I was tired of answering it. In addition, it was often just my workaholic boss phoning me for some minor thing that could have waited until then next day but because he thought of it at that precise moment, he had to call me. When call display came along it was a great invention and I still love it. The same goes for voice mail. These are phone tools that allow me to decide if I’m available on the phone or not.
And that’s the crux of the matter. I don’t like the assumption cell phones create that I’m at the beck and call of anyone who wants to dial my number.
Surprisingly, I do actually own a cell phone. I load it up with a paltry amount of minutes every couple of months. I keep it in the car. I have it for emergencies or for my convenience. I only turn it on when I want to use it or if I’m waiting for a call from friends. It’s a tool and I use it when it’s useful and necessary to me. I use lots of tools everyday. I don’t carry a screwdriver with me into stores and everywhere else just in case a screwdriver emergency arises, but when I need one I have one available. The same goes for the cell phone. My beef is not with the tool itself, but with the tools users.
Whoops, gotta run. My screwdriver just rang.
Now, I don’t care if a guy has hair or not. Earpiece thingies are equal opportunity idiot makers. I only mention the bald thing because “Picard wannabes” was the first image I got when I saw them. I’m not a big Star Trek fan. Did Picard even ever wear something so stupid hanging off the side of his head? My gut says no, that he had the sci-fi chest communication thingy, but I could be wrong.
Anyway, equal opportunity idiot makers. The guys without hair look like they’re trying to be Picard. At least it’s pretty obvious that they’re talking on the phone because it’s extremely noticeable on the side of their bald heads. The guys with hair walk around looking like they’re talking to themselves and should be given a wide berth. You can’t really tell they’re on the phone unless you look carefully. And who wants to look carefully at a madman? That just spells T-R-O-U-B-L-E.
This is just the latest in my ever-growing list of reasons to hate cell phones. But I have many others.
First off, is anyone really that important that they need to be in contact with others 24/7? Ok, maybe if you’re a doctor or other people’s lives are depending on you a cell is necessary, but for the vast majority of warm bodies out there it’s just an annoying and rude little toy that mistakenly elevates the sense of self-importance. People think that the world will fall apart if they can’t be reached by phone. Newsflash: It won’t.
Manners have gone by the wayside where cell phones are concerned. I recently went out on a first date with a perfectly nice fella who seemed alright until he answered his cell phone and yakked for a good ten minutes to the guy on the other end about almost nothing while I stood around trying not to eavesdrop. It wasn’t an “escape-route-in-case-this-first-date-sucks” call because he wanted to hang around with me for another couple of hours but also took another 5-10 minute call during that time. These weren’t “I’m-so-busy-and-important-I-can’t-be-away-from-a-phone” calls, either. They were more “I-have-a-cell-phone-and-I’m-afraid-to-miss-any-call, even-the-ones-from-phone-solicitors” calls. It didn’t make a great first impression on me and pretty much tarnished his appeal from the get-go. Dating tip for dummies: Shut it off. (guys and girls!)
You can’t have dinner in a restaurant without some annoying ring tone going off or someone yakking while waiting for friends. Although most people turn off the ringer in movie theatres, they still peek at their phones if they vibrate to see who’s calling and the annoying little screens shine away in the dark. Going to the movies is supposed to be about ESCAPISM. How can you frickin’ well escape if you are a slave to your phone? And speaking of slavery, don’t get me started on text messaging…the decline of proper spelling, people hunched over their little screens and keypads…illiteracy and physical abuse…sure sounds like slavery to me. Liberate yourselves, people!
I recently read Stephen King’s book, “Cell”, in which an insidious signal is broadcast via cell phones and everyone who has one becomes a raging zombie. Only a few phoneless people escape and the future of normal people depends on them. Amen, brother!
I think my hatred of cell phones is rooted in my past. Years of answering phones on the job. At that time, I would hate the sound of a ringing phone when I went home because I was tired of answering it. In addition, it was often just my workaholic boss phoning me for some minor thing that could have waited until then next day but because he thought of it at that precise moment, he had to call me. When call display came along it was a great invention and I still love it. The same goes for voice mail. These are phone tools that allow me to decide if I’m available on the phone or not.
And that’s the crux of the matter. I don’t like the assumption cell phones create that I’m at the beck and call of anyone who wants to dial my number.
Surprisingly, I do actually own a cell phone. I load it up with a paltry amount of minutes every couple of months. I keep it in the car. I have it for emergencies or for my convenience. I only turn it on when I want to use it or if I’m waiting for a call from friends. It’s a tool and I use it when it’s useful and necessary to me. I use lots of tools everyday. I don’t carry a screwdriver with me into stores and everywhere else just in case a screwdriver emergency arises, but when I need one I have one available. The same goes for the cell phone. My beef is not with the tool itself, but with the tools users.
Whoops, gotta run. My screwdriver just rang.
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Today’s Treasure: Actually, it’s a weekend treasure. My friend Wayne was home from Toronto and passed through town. He, his mom and I had Friday dinner & a movie and Saturday lunch. The two of them picked Saskatoon berries earlier in the week and brought me a bucketful. Time spent with friends is very precious, especially when they live far away.
3 comments:
I hear ya, sister. I'm glad I'm not that important.
Hooray for your weekend treasure! While we were at the lake, Dusty noticed some saskatoons growing nearby, so we picked a few. Yum!
As a self confessed Trekkie fan, I am here to set the record straight. Picard did not wear anything as vulgar as one of those huge ear pieces. He was the communicator in the chest type. The rude electronic devices attached to body parts were left for the Borgs.
Good for people to know.
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